What causes burnout in women?
Burnout is the name given to a state of being. It happens when someone experiences a prolonged period of stress that’s gone completely unmanaged and unnoticed. With burnout you’ll likely be experiencing mental exhaustion, fatigue and physical symptoms.
Burnout might not be classed as a mental health condition, but it is a recognised and accepted term among health professionals.
Dr. Christina Maslach is a burnout expert and professor at the University of California and the creator of the Maslach Burnout Inventory.
She’s considered one of the most qualified experts ever to speak on burnout. Her decades of research contributed to what she describes as “six mismatches”.
These are the six areas where burnout happens most.
It’s important to remember that burnout isn’t failure. The mismatch is not your fault.
These are pressures that society often puts upon you. That doesn’t mean you’re not capable, it just means you’ve not been able to build the resilience, capacity or learned the tools to thrive in those environments. And sometimes the environments need to change.
When looking at the causes of burnout in women, it’s important that we look at it with a different lens. Being female often comes with systemic pressures and responsibilities, not to mention our biological differences in make-up.
With all of these considerations combined, here are the six mismatches that can cause burnout in women specifically:
The workload mismatch causing burnout
When we think or talk about burnout, the most obvious factor is work. We think about the workplace, the leadership roles, pressures of running teams, managing budgets and meeting targets. The combination of responsibility plus creeping hours that fail to leave enough time for recovery.
But for women specifically it extends far beyond the workplace.
For women it’s the mental load. The invisible work.
The planning and organising.
Birthdays, holidays and celebrations.
School plays, homework and clubs.
Caring for loved ones, children, parents and friends.
Bedtimes, meal preparation and shopping.
With all this workload women very often leave little time for themselves to recover.
They don’t see the invisible work as “work”.
Does that resonate with you? Do you see the invisible work you do day to day?
The control mismatch causing burnout
This is the power of saying no. We know that women struggle to say no. We feel like we don’t have control over our responsibilities. After all, if we don’t do it, who will?
So we carry on. Saying yes to too much. We feel out of control.
When you feel like you have no autonomy over your decisions, and your responsibilities start to pile up, burnout is looming.
Struggling to ask for help and worrying about disappointing others; these are things women say they have experienced in the lead up to burnout.
Over a prolonged period of time, it becomes a physical strain and leads to burnout.
Do you feel like you’re unable to say no? Do you feel like you shoulder all of the responsibility with very little control?
The reward mismatch causing burnout
Do you feel like the effort you’re putting in at work is getting little recognition in return? Or that keeping up with both work and childcare goes unnoticed and unappreciated?
This is the reward mismatch.
It’s not selfish to want recognition. It’s not selfish to need reward.
Rewards can come in a number of ways. Salary, promotions, time out at the spa! You absolutely deserve it.
When we feel there is no reward, we start to detach. We start to feel resentment. What’s the point? Where is the meaning? You start to become numb and your effort declines. So you drop balls. And it escalates.
It doesn’t mean you don’t care. It means you’ve burnt out.
The community mismatch causing burnout
Community is a mismatch that doesn’t immediately come to mind.
This isn’t about being lonely with no one else physically around you. Quite the opposite – you’re likely surrounded by people. At work and at home.
But you don’t feel supported.
You’re a high-achieving woman who’s always been seen as capable and strong. So people don’t automatically reach out and ask if you’re okay. And you find it harder to be vulnerable, because you’ve always been the one to hold it all. You are seen as this highly dependable person, so you mask your struggles.
Research in this area shows that this lack of support is strongly associated with burnout. And it’s where, as women, we must learn some vulnerability, within a space where we can feel safely supported.
The fairness mismatch causing burnout
This leads on from the reward mismatch. Because not only do women feel like the rewards don’t match up, but there is also a feeling of it being one-sided.
Why are women carrying such a disproportionate amount of the labour compared to men?
Why is it women who experience this imbalance that men rarely talk about?
We think it, we feel it in our bodies. We know it’s been like this for hundreds of years despite progress telling us that things are ‘better’ – but it’s still there.
You might even have people in the workplace who don’t appear to be ‘pulling their weight’, leaving the majority of the work to you. And it goes unnoticed. So you keep quiet and soldier on.
That is the fairness mismatch. It causes stress. And over a prolonged period of time this becomes chronic stress that leads to burnout.
The values mismatch causing burnout
Our values change over our lifetime. Every decade we have new responsibilities, hopes, dreams and even fears.
We evolve.
But our daily routines stay the same. Perhaps the same jobs, the same friends, or the same relationships.
These were things you once chose that aligned with your values. And maybe that’s different now.
But you feel obligated to stay on the same path. Because the guilt of doing anything different is too much. It would feel too selfish.
And so over time this mismatch in values can slowly chip away at your identity. So now you’re a different person, living a mismatched life.
This is a deep layer that takes a lot of uncovering and honest self-reflection.
Because if left, it leads to intense feelings of sadness, detachment and loss of self.
Conclusion
These mismatches prove that burnout in women is not necessarily caused by one thing. That burnout is an environmental consequence – not a personal failure.
And the exciting news is that you can recover.
It doesn’t mean burning it all down and starting again. Cancelling relationships and quitting your job!
It means taking an honest look at all areas of your life to assess and evaluate. And sometimes it takes another person there to hold your hand.
If anything in this article resonates with you, I’d love to invite you to take that first step and book a clarity call with me. No pressure to do anything. Except just talk for a few minutes and tell me how you’re feeling, so I can share the best way forward on your journey to burnout recovery.
Frequently Asked Questions About What Causes Burnout in Women
What is the main cause of burnout in women?
Burnout is rarely caused by one single thing. Research suggests that burnout develops when prolonged stress goes unmanaged over time. For many women, this can include a combination of work pressures, caring responsibilities, household management, emotional labour and a lack of time for recovery.
Can burnout be caused by the mental load?
Yes. The mental load is one of the biggest contributors to burnout in women. Mental load refers to the invisible work involved in planning, organising, remembering and managing daily life. Things like appointments, birthdays, school, shopping and caring responsibilities all require mental energy, even when they’re not visible to others.
Is burnout always caused by work?
No - this is a myth that sadly means a lot of women miss the signs of burnout, thinking that it doesn't apply to them. Workplace stress can contribute to burnout, but many women experience burnout due to a combination of factors both inside and outside of work. Family responsibilities, caring for others, relationship pressures and a lack of support can all contribute to burnout.
Why are women more likely to experience burnout?
Research suggests women are more likely to experience burnout because they often carry a greater share of the caring responsibilities, household tasks and emotional labour. Combine that with work demands and societal expectations, and this can create ongoing stress that increases the risk of burnout.
Can people-pleasing lead to burnout?
Struggling to say no, taking on too many responsibilities and constantly putting other people's needs before your own can absolutely contribute to burnout. This is why boundaries are an incredibly important part of burnout recovery.
Can burnout be prevented?
It’s not realistic to avoid stress completely. Healthy amounts of stress build resilience and capacity. But burnout can be prevented by recognising the early warning signs, creating healthy boundaries, asking for support not just from professionals, but from those close to you and by prioritising your recovery. It can take time to build these habits and understand the signs, but once you do, you’ll be far better prepared to spot and manage it.
How can I start recovering from burnout?
The first step is recognising that burnout is not a personal failure. It’s not your fault! Recovery often involves a holistic approach. We use my ARCH method. Awareness, Regulation, Clarity and Holding. Accountability and ongoing support is key to recovery.
